UPJOKE

Light Sleeper Jokes

If a light sleeper sleeps with a light on, does a hard sleeper sleep with a

window open?

I wish I could say I am a light sleeper...

But I’m honestly just fat at all hours of the day.

Wanna have an exciting night ?

A girl brings a guy home from the club.
Before they enter the house she mentions

Hope it's ok that I live at home with the family...

Yeah it's fine says the guy

They start to kiss and as thing start to heat up the girl says :

Oh BTW did I mention that my father is i...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Melons in Love

Once upon a time, there were two teenage melons who fell in love at first sight, so they decided to run away to Vegas to get married. The melons woke up very early one morning to sneak away, since the drive would take all day and all night, and also because they suspected their parents would not app...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The new recruit [Long]

Bob's out with the rest of his army troop on deployment out in the middle of nowhere. After a couple of months, the loneliness and sexual frustration starts reeeeeeally getting to him. He even tries subtly beating off in his bunk while the rest of the room's asleep, but gets sharply hissed at from t...

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