UPJOKE

Lazy Eye Jokes

The scientific term for lazy eye is atchaphoria.

One eye is looking atcha and the other is looking phoria.

I dated a girl with a lazy eye once.

It turns out she was seeing someone else on the side.

I have a girlfriend with a lazy eye. She's the best.

Whenever I make a mistake she always looks the other way.

Why can’t people with a lazy eye be teachers?

They can’t control their pupils!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was born without eyelids, so they created them from my foreskin...

Now I’m a little cock-eyed.

My dad has a lazy eye and tells this joke when someone asks about it.

Man shoots another man five times but insists to law enforcement that it was an accident...

"How can you shoot someone five times by accident?" The officer asked.

"Well i was aiming for the man beside him but i have a lazy eye" the man said.

Asked my eye doctor if he had my test results. He said there’s good news & bad news.

He said, “The good news is we’ve discovered why you’ve been so lethargic & slovenly lately…The bad news is we’ve discovered your lazy eye has spread to the rest of your body.”

What do you call a fat kid with 3 teeth and a lazy eye?

Names.

I was born with a lazy eye...

...and it spread to the rest of my body.

Hear about the teacher with two lazy eyes?

Didn't last more then a day, couldn't control his pupils.

A traveling salesman’s car breaks down, so he walks to a nearby farmhouse...

The salesman is a very, very good looking guy. The farmer answers the door and while waiting for a tow truck, the farmer tells him he’s got three beautiful daughters who are itching to get married. The salesman tells him he’d be delighted to meet them. He says it’s always been his dream to marry an ...

My ophthalmologist told me I have a lazy eye

I am glad he didn’t discovered about the rest of my body.

Why did the lazy eyed teacher get fired?

because he couldn’t keep his pupils in check

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A cow gets stolen from a family…

The mother cries to her three sons, “Boys! Some prick has stolen our cow!”

The first son says, “If it’s a prick, it must be someone from Randville”

The second son, “If it’s someone from Randville, they must be short”

The third son, “If it’s someone short from Randville, it must ...

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