UPJOKE

My blonde wife was late to the party.

But, she explained that she had to wait for a train at the crossing. The sign said watch for trains and she said she had to wait 40 minutes before she saw one.

Why was the broom late to the party?

It overswept.

What cake was always late to the party?

ChocoLATE

Hahah I'll leave now I just needed to brag about my dope reddit bday

Why was the hipster fish late to the party?

Because he didn’t take the mainstream.

What happens to the cannibal who is late to the party?

He gets the cold shoulder.

What did the host say to the sperm that arrived late to the party?

Hey Jack, you late!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy loses his penis in an accident.

He asks the doctor if there’s any hope of reconstruction. The doctor says “Sure. There have been a lot of medical advancements lately, but it’s not cheap.”

“How much does it cost?” asked the man.

“About $1,000 an inch. You should probably discuss this with your wife and let me know wha...

A little late to the party here, but for my New Year's resolution, I decided to dedicate more time to my step machine.

I never knew my real machine. 😢

Joke from my 4 year old

Knock knock

Whose there?

Turnip

Turnip who?

You better turn up, or you'll be late to the party!

A Communist Dies.

And since he was an honest man albeit an atheist, he was sentenced to rotate spending one year in Hell and one year in Heaven. One year passes and Satan says to God: "Take this man as fast as possible. Because he turned all my young demons into Young Pioneers, I have to restore some order." Another ...

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