UPJOKE

They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away…

I grew a whole damn orchard and still can’t get rid of these medical bills

An apple a day keeps the doctor away . . .

. . . Especially if you throw it at him

My Grandma always used to say, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away. "

I don't know if that's true, or just one of Granny's myths.

An Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor Away

A doctor and an engineer loved the same girl. Doctor used to give her a rose daily and engineer used to give the girl an apple. Girl got confused and asked engineer : There is a meaning of giving rose in Love, Why are you giving apple ? Engineer answered : Because "An apple a day keeps the doctor aw...

If you don't believe 'An apple a day keeps the doctor away'...

...try throwing it harder next time.

Everyone says “an apple a day keeps the doctor away” is a incorrect statement

But I’m starting to think people just aren’t as good at throwing as I am.

If an Apple today keeps the doctor away...

If an Apple today keeps the doctor away then he must be using IOS6 maps.

An overconfident MMA fighter entered the cage without proper warmup and had not trained for months. Subsequently he incurred a severe injury for which the doctor advised to not enter the ring ever again. Thus it is appropriately said...

A grapple a day keeps the doctor away

A doctor and a lawyer loved the same girl

Everyday the doctor brought her roses, while the lawyer got her an apple, without fail. One day, the girl decides to ask the lawyer why the apples, to which the lawyer replies, “an apple a day keeps the doctor away”

A doctor and a programmer both like the same woman

Every day, the doctor brings her a flower, while the programmer brings her an apple.

Eventually, she chooses to go out with the programmer.

Outraged, the doctor asks the programmer why he brought her apples.

The programmer responded “An Apple a day keeps the doctor away”

Anna Paula went to the doctor.

She checked in at the desk. The receptionist asked her name.
"Anna Paula" she replied.
"And your last name?"
"My last name is Day."
The receptionist went back to the doctor and came back quickly. "I'm sorry the doctor refused to see you."


Which just proves that Anna Paula Day...

Doctor and Engineer wanted to date the same girl

The girl said to both what can you do for me. The Doctor being well-off bought the girl a diamond ring and the girl smiled and said thank you. The Engineer brought the girl an apple and the girl was confused. She said "why did you bring an apple?". The Engineer replied "An apple a day, keeps the Doc...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm 17 and I like to write jokes in my spare time. Thought reddit might like to hear some.

I think blonde jokes are awful. I mean, the poor things don't even understand them.

So I got this pair of shoes that cost me an arm and a leg. Luckily, my mom still pays for everything.

Statistics have shown that 9 out of 11 people are offended by this joke.

I've yet to be dispr...

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