UPJOKE

Keep Go Jokes

[META] r/Jokes keeps me going

I'm sorry if this is not allowed here but I had to share. I have a bunch of health issues, severe anxiety, and depression. I've on multiple occasions felt like giving up. Sometimes, no matter how much support you have it is difficult to keep going. That's where you guys come in. I read your jokes al...

Recently started dating a chinese girl but not sure if I want to keep going.

She’s been raising a lot of red flags.

I really admire people who keep going despite being in a lot of debt

They really deserve a lot of credit

People love a good "keep going" message

Except at the end of a marathon

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

While my wife was giving birth, I bent down and whispered "You're nearly there, keep going...keep going. Just keep your eyes closed and breathe slow."

"Thanks," said the doctor, "I've just never seen a vagina this ugly."

Heating bills keep going up so I crossed a sheep with a kangaroo.

To make a wooly jumper.

Why does America keep going in circles

Because they're all about their rights

After climaxing to near exhaustion, my gf asked me to keep going

I replied, “Come again?”

I hate having to keep going to the kitchen to fill my glass of water.

Take a pitcher it will last longer

Jokes about drowning billionaires are disgusting.

I mean, how low can you go?

Scarlett Johansson is on a plane that crashes on a remote island.

She and some regular guy are the only two survivors. They make the best of their situation, scavenge what supplies they can from the plane, and try to keep going.

They build a little hut on the beach and - both of them having certain "needs" - eventually start hooking up.

This keep goi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mummy mummy... why do I keep going round in circles?

Shut the fuck up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor.

All my friends keep going on and on about the benefits of solar energy, but honestly.....

I’m more of a fan of wind.

I don't understand why people keep going after Trump for Russian ties

All of his ties are made in China, just look at the label!

My wife was just in a minor accident. She's told the police that the man she hit was on his phone and drinking a Coke at the time

But they keep going on about how he can do what he wants in his own living room.

Why did the Baker keep going to the ATM?

He kneaded the dough

During the USSR regime a communist governor is visiting one of the small towns in his district

The mayor of the town is excited to show the governor how dedicated his people are to the communist party, so as they are walking through the town bazaar, he pulls one of the farmers aside
to ask him a couple of questions.

He asked "Comrade, if you had two apartments, wouldn't you be ...

HUSBANDS FOR SALE !!!

A store that sells husbands has just opened,
where a woman may go to choose a husband.

Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Intestinal worm-- long. Very long.

Man has horrible abdominal pain and weight loss. The wife finally convinces him to see a doctor.
He's diagnosed with an intestinal worm and is given treatments but it doesn't work. He sees several more doctors who all diagnose the same thing, an intestinal worm, but none of the treatments are w...

The Devil sat at the gates of hell... (Story Joke)

An old man suddenly arrived in a burst of flames, looking confused and lost. The Devil looked at his paperwork, and frowned. He was unable to find this old man’s data file.

“This can’t be right,” the old man grumbled, looking at the Devil, “I’ve been a good man my whole life.”

The Dev...

Old lady gets into a Merzedes-Benz taxi cab

As she hops in, the driver asks her where she's going. She gives him an adress, as she's just arrived to town to visit family.

They keep going for a bit, when the old lady notices the very characteristic Mercedes-Benz ornament emblem mounted on the hood.

"So what is that thing for?" s...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.