UPJOKE
inference

I tell people to hold their horses before jumping to conclusions.

I just want them to have stable lives.
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Why did the conspiracy theorist have such strong legs?

Because he spent so much time jumping to conclusions
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I asked my girlfriend if she does any other exercises...

Other than jumping to conclusions.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Priest takes a walk down to the docks one day

and runs into a fisherman that attends his church. Upon hearing that the priest has a few hours off the fisherman invites him out to sea to fish with him.

Out at sea it doesn't take long for the fisherman to realize that the priest has no idea how to fish, so he gives him some quick instructi...

My friend asked whats my favourite form of cardio

Jumping to conclusions
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I really don't understand how Karen’s aren’t in better shape...

They’re always stretching the truth and jumping to conclusions
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Man to friend: " The doctor told my wife she should do some exercise."

Friend: "And is she doing this?
Man: "Well, she is - if jumping to conclusions and running up bills can be called exercise!"
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I used to think skipping to the ends of stories would save time...

...but then I learned to stop jumping to conclusions.
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How do women get excersice?

By jumping to conclusions.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do my wife and an automatic toilet flusher have in common?

They both start jumping to conclusions before I even have a chance to sit my ass down.

How does Donald Trump gets his exercise?

By jumping to conclusions
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I get plenty of exercise.

I'm frequently jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines.
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I wonder how many calories women burn by...

... jumping to conclusions.
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How my girlfriend stay's thin.

Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin?

She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.
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My wife loves sports...

Her favorite position is beside herself, and her favorite sport is jumping to conclusions.
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