UPJOKE

Jokes About Jokes

I like jokes. But jokes about air conditioners?

Not a fan.

I'm appalled and really can't believe all the tasteless jokes about the Titanic submarine.

Seriously, how can people sink so low?

Jokes about drowning billionaires are disgusting.

I mean, how low can you go?

Why do Americans rarely tell jokes about mass shootings?

Because it’s always too soon.



^(i feel bad)

I don't understand all these jokes about mothers-in-law.

Mine is sweet, supportive, and a great influence on me and my wife. I can't say anything bad about her.

Jokes about communism isn't funny

Unless everyone gets them

I have like 50 jokes about the unemployed

Trouble is, none of them work.

I’ve seen a few jokes about dwarfs recently and I’m sick of it.

My girlfriend has dwarfism, and is kinder and works harder than anyone I know. She deserves respect and shouldn’t be treated so poorly by you lot.

In fact, to make it up to her I’m going to make her a lovely meal, pour her a glass of wine, and run her a nice hot sink.

I cracked a joke about dementia to my friend at the bus. The old man sitting next to me politely asked. "Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?"

I replied "yes I cancer." Then I cracked tumor

jokes about the war in Ukraine I heard in Romania

Putin dies and goes to hell, but a few years later he gets permission to leave hell and to visit Moscow for a day -

Goes to a pub in Moscow, orders a few drinks and asks the bartender:

Crimea is still ours ? - Yes, bartender says

Donbas is still ours ? - Yes, ours

Is Kiev...

Jokes about murderers aren’t funny.

Unless they’re executed properly, that is.

I hate jokes about airplanes

All they do is fly over my head

My wife and I had two miscarriages last year, and I believe there should be more jokes about miscarriages so we talk about it more...

The only problem is most of the jokes die before you finish delivering them.

—————————————————————

*The title of the post is true and humor is how I deal with my pain*

Jokes about menstruation are inappropriate.

Period.

Making jokes about Trump taking us to war is all fun and games until

You realize you're a healthy young man

Neil Armstrong used to tell really bad jokes about walking on the Moon.

When nobody laughed he would follow with, "Ah well. I guess you had to be there."

I don’t make jokes about short people

They’re beneath me

Ok guys. No jokes about Jesus on Easter...

**He's not the kind of guy you'd want to cross.**

Mods can we please ban jokes about hymens?

They’re tearable.

Is it too early for jokes about the submersible?

Because I have one that will crush it.

Telling jokes about pizza is hard.

It's all in the delivery.

My boss fired me for making jokes about Asians again

It was the end of my Korea

My girlfriend told me she would break up with me if I kept telling jokes about the USSR

Soviet

What do dead kids and jokes about dead kids have in common?

They never get old.

I was about to tell some new jokes about the expensive eggs I bought

But before I could, someone poached them.

Jokes about food should not be criticized too parshley

They should be taken in-gest.



English is not my first cabbage, and my 6-week old cauliflower did not write this joke.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Don’t crack jokes about clitoris [NSFW]

It is a sensitive spot for many people.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jokes about anal are hard to understand.

But you usually get it in the end.

I hate jokes about John Denver

They never land well.

Jokes about tech support really turn me off

...and then back on.

Why don't mathematicians tell jokes about pi?

Because they're never-ending and irrational!

I was listening to a Russian in Russia making jokes about Putin

The jokes were average, but the execution was excellent.

Please don't make any more jokes about the Coronavirus...

My friend has it and it's serious. He got it from a tick bite...

It's the first reported case of Corona with Lyme.

Why are there no knock knock jokes about America?

Cause' freedom rings

Why are jokes about game developers always so funny?

They work on so many levels

Jokes about cocaine do not make me laugh

But a good one liner will make me snort

I think we should stop making jokes about fat people

They obviously have enough on their plate already

I like making jokes about Jesus

I usually nail them

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jokes about homosexuals are not funny.

I mean come on guys.

I hate jokes about chickens.

They're all fowl.

I entered a contest where I had to submit eleven jokes about Wimbledon.

But I think tennis enough.

Why are jokes about suicide bombers are not funny.

Well for starters, their delivery is just everywhere.

It's risky making jokes about 9/11

Not all of them land

Does anybody know any jokes about salt?

Na

I used to tell a lot of jokes about airplane crashes...

...but they never landed well.

Jokes about the handicapped aren't funny

No one knows what it's like to not walk a mile in their shoes.

5 Jokes about Boiling Water

1. Perhaps I shouldn't joke on here about boiling water, it might be too steamy.
2. RIP Boiling Water. You will be mist.
3. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
4. What do you get when your pour boiling water down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies
5. One cannibal says ...

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