UPJOKE

Incredibly Good Jokes

Why are lines being drawn incredibly good in North Korea?

Because they have a Supreme Ruler

What do you call someone who is incredibly good at estimating the weight of objects?

A masstermind

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sportsman's Callenge

(25/M) I was at the bar the other night. Early. I could read my book, and drink my bourbon without distraction. I'm reading, drinking, enjoying my time.

About an hour in, a very good looking older woman walks in. She sits right next to me and orders a Bulleit bourbon, light rocks. As that's w...

It's foolish for humans to try and take back the planet of the apes

Since they are incredibly good at gorilla warfare.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is sitting in the doctors office...

The doctor comes in and she is incredibly good looking. She asks him what the problem is and he is hesitant to reply.

"It's kind of embarrassing.", he says.

"It's okay," she says, "I've seen it all. Don't be embarrassed. Whatever the problem is, I can help you."

He sit's there f...

Jim asks his formerly obese friend Phil how he has lost weight so fast

Phil replies, "I tell you my secret. There's this clinic I went to. They have a special program that makes you lose weight incredibly fast. Here's the address."



So next weekend Jim has his first appointment at the clinic. He is welcomed by the doctor who sends him upstairs to the firs...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Crude Pianist.

A pianist scored an interview at a local restaurant. He is sent to the manager and is asked to play a few songs from memory.

The pianist says - “this is one of my favourites. It’s called ‘I Was Fucking Your Dog But It Bit My Penis So Now My Balls Hurt’”.

The manager, appalled, says - “...

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