UPJOKE

I Want To Hear Jokes

I want to hear 99 people sing ‘Africa’ by Toto.

It’s something that a hundred men or more could never do.

“Alexa, turn on CNN. I want to hear the news.”

“You’ll have to pick one or the other.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife told me I only hear what I want to hear

I replied don't be silly, of course I'll take a blow job

Joke Request: Your momma jokes. Give me your best. I want to hear them all. Best joke gets reddit gold for two months.

Oh, and one rule for the gold: It cannot be a joke I have heard before. Makes it more interesting. ;)

**GAMERMAN85 IS IN THE LEAD. GOLD WILL BE AWARDED WHEN THREAD IS 72 HRS OLD AND AWARDED TO BEST JOKE AT THAT TIME**

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(true story) The LAST thing I want to hear as my Japan Airlines flight takes off towards the path of a typhoon

"We hope you enjoy your fright"


(Seriously: I know this could come across as sounding racist, but this actually happened.)

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