An engineer had a sign in front of his clinic that said, "Medical consultation for only $50. If I can't make you better, I will pay you $100."
A doctor, knowing he can stump the engineer and wanting to get some cash, goes straight to the engineer. "Hey," he says. "I lost my sense of taste. I can't taste any food anymore."
The engineer takes a small bottle from his drawer, told the doctor to take his tongue out, and put 15 drops of t...
I can't make Casey Anthony jokes.
My mom would kill me...
I can't make up my mind on elevator jokes
They're pretty up and down
I got my brother really good earlier today.
We were packing up for an early morning fishing trip and I told him to turn the light on in the garage.
He looked at it and he said "It's already on."
I looked at him and said "It's not on enough."
He said "What? It's on!"
I said "More on".
He said, "It's an on/of...
A court joke from a joke book published in 1904:
Judge—' 'What's the charge agin' this man?" Officer— "Stealing nine bottles of beer, your honor." Judge—' 'Discharged. I can't make a case out of nine bottles."
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A reporter went to a small village...
And asked one of the villagers, "hey could you tell me a story about your village?" The villager says "well one time a neighbors goat got lost in the mountains, and we all got together to look for it, and then we found it. We all celebrated and drank and then we all had sex with the goat".
T...
What's the difference
What's the difference between a hormone and a bad joke?
I can't make a hormone.
I asked the gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits
He replied, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make it on Tuesdays."
A magic coin
I have a magic coin that whenever flipped lands on its side.
I can't make heads nor tails of it.
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