UPJOKE

I Asked The Librarian Jokes

I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia.

She whispered, "they're right behind you!"

I asked the librarian for a book on Pavlov's dog and Schrodinger's cat.

She said it rang a bell but didn't know if it was there or not.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I asked the librarian if she had the new book about short penises....

She said, "It's not in yet".
I replied, "YES, That's The Book!"

I asked the librarian if they had any books on Pavlov.

She said she’d have to check to be sure, but that the name rang a bell.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I asked the librarian for a book on suicide

She replied fuck off, you'll never bring it back

I asked the librarian if she had any books on turtles..

"Hard back?" she inquired..

"Yes..." I replied. "And little heads"

I asked the librarian for level 5 programming books.

Instead he gave me some programming 101 book. I don't why.

New York is a great city. Today I was at the library, & I asked the librarian for a library card. He told me I first had to prove I was from New York.

So I stabbed him.

I asked the librarian if she knew who authored any books on dinosaurs.

She said, "Try Sarah Topps."

I asked the librarian for the latest book on erectile dysfunction.

She tapped the keys to her computer keyboard and said..

"It's not coming up!"...

I said.."Yeah!...that's the one!!

I asked the librarian if she would direct me to the "self help" books.

She said "that sort of defeats the purpose doesn't it"

I went to the library, and I asked the librarian if they carried a book called “How To Deal With Rejection.”

She told me no, so I started shaking and weeping uncontrollably.

I asked the librarian if the library had books on erectile dysfunction

She said: "Of course, they're not hard to come by"

I went to library for a cook book.

I asked the librarian,

"In which section can I find a cook book, please?"

She said,

"For you? Fiction."

I looked at my thesis at the library

I noticed several pages were missing. So I asked the librarian "Hey, what's up here? There are several pages missing from my thesis!"

The librarian said "Well, your thesis got sick. So we had to perform an appendectomy on it."

Nerdy physics and psychology joke thought I'd share.

I heard that there is a new novel out about Schrodinger's cat and Pavlov's dog going on an adventure but I couldn't remember the name. Sounded good so I decided to go down to the library to see if they've got it. Looked around and couldn't see it so I asked the librarian if they have it in, she repl...

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