UPJOKE

I'm So Lonely Jokes

When I drink alcohol, people call me alcoholic. But when I drink fanta, no one calls me

or texts me, I'm so lonely, pls help.

I'm so lonely

Even Jehovah's Witnesses won't knock on my door because they know I just want to talk.

What kind of train eats too much?

A chew chew train

**AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH**
**AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA**

omg please PM me

I'm so lonely

I need friends

How lonely are you?

I'm so lonely I go to the batting cages to play catch.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do really ugly people and really good-looking people have in common?

No one of the opposite sex has the guts to talk to them...

I'm so lonely

Had a three-way on Valentine's night...

Me and Ben & Jerrys. I'm so lonely.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A dog named Sex

Folks generally aren't very creative in choosing names for their dogs.

That's why there are so many named Rover and Spot.

But, have you heard the plight of the fellow who thought he'd be cute and named his dog Sex?

It goes like this:
"One day Sex and I took a walk and he ran...

ln(x) is hosting a calculus party....

and all the functions are invited. Some of them are radical, at least 1/3 of them are rational, and like all parties, there are a few odd ones talking to their imaginary friends. Amidst all of this revelry, ln(x) is talking to some trig functions, when he sees his friend e^x sulking in a corner.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Nose to nose

There was this really short little Jewish guy who wanted to get married. So he went to a marriage broker to help him find a wife. After looking over the broker's album of photos of candidates he decides on the girl for him. But the broker protests that he is only 5"3" and the girl he has chosen is 6...

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