Bros Vs. Hoes.

A woman doesn't come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house. The husband calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.


A man doesn’t come home one night. The next day he tells his wife that he had slept o...

Personally, I don't believe in bros before hoes, or hoes before bros.

There needs to be a balance.

A homie-hoe-stasis, if you will.

Some say Bros before Hoes. Some say Hoes before Bros

I prefer homie-hoe-stasis

What do you call a hoe from Idaho?

A tater thot.

A philosopher saw a pimp having a sale on some of his hoes

The philosopher said: a penny for your thots.

What kinda hoes help you tend to your garden?

Helpful hoes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Y'all hoes need to stop asking God for a good man

cause I can't be everywhere at once. This shit is exhausting.

Garden-variety hoe...

still sounds like a terrible insult despite clearly specifying which kind of hoe is meant.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between a hoe and a prostitute?

One is a tool. The other is your mom.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Who’s the biggest hoe in history?

Ms. Pac-man, because for 25 cents she swallows balls until she dies.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Hammer had sex with an Hoe.

They named their baby Homer

Her: “Denounce all your hoes!”

Him: “All my Hoes, stand back and stand by...!”

Personally, I don't believe in bros before hoes, or hoes before bros. There needs to be a balance.

A homie-hoe-stasis, if you will.

My girlfriend told me there is no way you can turn a hoe into a housewife

I said "Yes you can". She said "How"?

I proposed.

Did you hear about the pimp who took up gardening?

He had a lot of hoes.

My girlfriend lives in Portland, she’s my Maine hoe

But I got a girl in Boise who’s my Sidaho

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between a bitch and a hoe?

The hoe fucks everyone at the party. The bitch fuck everyone but you.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call the payout pimps make prostitutes pay them for every John?

Hoe owners fee.

Why should you always get a pedicure before planting your garden?

Toes before hoes

What do you call a bunch of hoes on the subway

A train of thot

Some say bros before hoes...

While some say bros before hoes, and some say hoes before bros, I believe there should be a balance; a homie-hoe-stasis if you will.

*this isn’t my joke but I was thinking of it today so I thought I’d share*

They call me fireman

Cuz I turn on the hoes

So, I asked my German grandfather hoe racist he was, scale of 1 to 10

He said "NEIN!"

Hoe much do pirates charge for corn?

About a buck an ear.

What's the difference between a farmer and a pimp?

The farmer makes an honest living with his hoe

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the pirate say to the bulimic prostitute?

Heave Hoe!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Who's the biggest hoe in history?

Mrs. Pacman. For 25 cents, that bitch swallowed balls till she died.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Do you know why they don't allow prostitutes on crew teams?

Because hoes are hard to row.

Thought I found a new groundbreaking invention

Turns out it was just another hoe

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got so many bitches and so many hoes.

Then again, it's unsurprising considering I'm a farmer.

A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down.

AAA (Antarctic Automobile Assn) tows it to the garage in the nearest town, where the mechanic says he has time to look at it, give him half an hour.

The penguin wanders down the street to an ice cream shop and decides to beat the heat with a cone of his favorite flavor, vanilla. Of course, b...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Which two US states are opposites?

Virgin-ia and I-da-hoe

what's the difference between a rapper and a country singer?

Country singers keep their hoes in the shed.

Why does Santa have a brothel on the north pole?

Cause that's where he keeps his hoe hoe hoes.

What is the best part about farming?

Getting down and dirty with my hoes.

If minecraft taught me one thing...

It's to never spend diamonds on a hoe.

Why did Mrs.Claus break up with Santa?

Because he kept calling her a hoe hoe hoe

"Old McDonald had some weed"

"He high, He high Hoe"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear that the Trump press conference today was held between landscaping store and a porno shop?

Turns out, he was just looking for a new hoe.

...ugh, I know this is terrible. Must do better.

Like, something something Bushwhacked.

'little help?

Hoe do you know if a snowman has been sleeping in your bed?

You wake up wet.

I may not be a chef

But boyardees hoes hurting my feelings

What do you call a hoe that you use to stir a fire.

An ash hoe.

What does Santa say when he finds out about Mrs. Claus's Only fans?

Hoe hoe hoe

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I was walking through a busy street with a ‘lady of the night’, when she tripped and fell over.

I shouted ‘Hey everyone, It’s a Hoe Down!’. A man produced a fiddle, and everyone broke into dance as you would expect in this kind of crappy joke.

What has four legs and says "hoe de doe, hoe de doe"?

Two black guys trying to catch an elevator.

What does a pimp gnome use to make his money?

The garden hoes.

I stole some gardening equipment from a pimp.

He found me, grabbed me by my collar and shouted, "Where my hoes at?"

Our boss told us to go to the tool room and grab a tool each. He then asked us to explain the importance of each tools that we picked.

Mike - "The hammer is good for nailing and building stuff"

John - " The hand saw is important for cutting woods"

Boss - " i see that you don't have any tool in your hands. That's pretty impressive because you are considering yourself as a tool right?"

Me - "I'm a hoe"

What does Amber Heard and Santa have in common?

Hoe hoe hoe

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two prostitutes meets at the bus to their corner.

"Hey hoe"

"Hey hoe"

"Off to work we go"

My friend once told me

You can’t enchant a hoe with loyalty!

How do you pickup on a female pirate?

Yell "Land Hoe"

What do pimps and farmers have in common?

They both need a hoe to stay in business

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.