UPJOKE

Hey You Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hey you, do you put nail polish on your butt?

'Cause that acetone.

“Hey you, Ninja!”

“Yeah?”

“Think you can hit that tree with your throwing star??”

“Shuriken!”

Jesus becomes a bartender. Man says hey you SOB I ordered a beer but you just gave me water.

I told you I could turn water into whine.

Hey you know what day it is today right?

10/4

Yo Momma is so fat...

When she's walking down the street, cops driving by scream out, "Hey you two --break it up!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Hey you home?"

"No, I lost my fucking keys again."

"If you had any brains, you'd do what I do."

"And that is?"

"I keep the important things next to things I know I can't lose."

"Good idea. I'll start keeping my things next to your virginity."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A koala bear is smoking a blunt in a tree

A lizard comes along and says “what are you doing?”. The koala bear says “I’m getting high man”. The lizard responds “what do you mean?”…. Rather than explain it to the lizard the koala bear convinces him to partake of the blunt.

Shortly after partaking, the lizard says to the koala “dude my ...

Friend - 'hey you want any of this cocaine?'

me - 'i've never done it before, could i od?'

friend - 'off one line lol, no.'

me - 'no thanks then'

Me: hey you following the Apple event?

Friend : what's that?.. No I'm not following it

Me : New Apple products and improvements are getting announced today

Friend : anything free?

Me : iWish

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