I asked what LGBTQ means and I've been getting lots of answers but here lies the problem

I couldn't get a straight answer

Here lies David Carradine

He came as he went

A man saw an epitaph in a cemetery which read: 'Here lies an honest man and politician.'

'Shame,' he cried, 'two people in the same grave!'

A man visiting a graveyard saw a tombstone that read: "Here lies John Smith, a lawyer and an honest man."

"How about that!" he exclaimed. "They've got three people buried in one grave."

Y’all remember that time Amelia Bedilia STALKED, HUNTED DOWN THREE MOOSE, AND WHIPPED THEM TO DEATH all for the nanny assignment of making homemade 3 Musketeers?

Mrs. Heindseight reported back for comment: “All we told her was to whip mousse”, she wept through tears.


And so here lies the “Three Musketeers”.

An elderly couple are making their funeral arrangements.

They get to choose what is engraved on each other's headstones.
Husband says, "Here lies Karen. Quiet at last"
Wife says, "Here lies Kevin, stiff at last"

A man and his son are driving past a graveyard.

Suddenly, the son leans forward and asks, "Do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"

Surprised, the man said, "Of course not! Why ask such a question?"

His son replied, well I read a gravestone that read, "Here lies a lawyer and an honest man".

What did they put on Margaret Thatcher's tombstone?

"Here Lies the Iron Lady.

May she rust in peace"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ninety-five year old virgin

Ninety-five year old Caroline died a virgin. Her last request stated that her headstone should read: "Here lies Caroline, born a virgin, died a virgin" The stone-cutter had a busy day, and made a shorter version, reading: "Caroline, returned unopened"

A lawyer named Strange died.

His friends asked the tombstone inscriber to write "Here lies Strange, an honest man and a lawyer" on the headstone. The inscriber suggested this would confuse people, who would think three men were buried there. He suggested "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer." "Whenever anyone walks...

It was the mid-1820’s when Phillip and his brother Terrance decided that they wanted to better their lives.

So the two brothers packed a wagon with everything they owned and started out from their small home in Missouri. The trail to Oregon was very tough and the relationship between the brothers was already stressed at best.

Phillip, being the older brother, was constantly very critical of his you...

What can be written on both a gravestone and the White House?

"Here lies Donald"

A husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary.

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.'" "Yeah?!" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, 'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"

A little boy and his father are walking in a cemetery

...and come across a gravestone that reads "here lies a lawyer and a good man"

The boy asks his father "Dad, why did they bury 2 men in 1 grave?"

I've got another example of the importance of Oxford commas:

I passed a headstone the other day which read, "Here lies Tyler Goetz, a lawyer and a good man."

 

I just can't believe the three of them agreed on such ambiguous syntax.

Two men walking in a cemetery find a gravestone

Two men walking in a cemetery find a recent gravestone , so they read it:

-"Here lies an honest man and a competent lawyer"

So one of the guys turn to the other:

-"When did they start burying two people together?"

Dentist’s tombstone:

"Here lies Frank Serra, filling his last cavity".

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