Happy Halloween... Why did the Ghost enter the bar...
For the BOOOOS
This one's a groaner for sure, but still fun. Happy Halloween!
A man is walking home alone late one foggy night... when behind him, he hears Bump... BUMP... BUMP... Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him. BUMP... BUMP... BUMP.....
Happy Halloween
Bob thought his new neighbor across the street was strange from the moment he first moved in. The new neighbor, Jack, was a dorky middle-aged white man, who laughed at his own jokes, which he told repeatedly, and only talked about the stupidest stuff, which he always claimed was super popular on Re...
How can you tell a girl ghost from a boy ghost?
Boooooooobs!
You’re welcome.
Happy Halloween everybody!
What do Jeffrey Epstein and Halloween decorations having common?
They don’t hang themselves.
Happy Halloween
The Competition - Wishing you a Happy Halloween!
Dracula wanted to know which of his bats was the best. So, he organized a little competition.
The bat which would drink more blood in less time than others would be the winner.
The first bat went and came back after 10 minutes. Its mouth was full of blood.
Dracula was impresse...
Happy Halloween
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Boy the Halloween vandals and pranksters hit my neighborhood hard already. They destroyed a bunch of street signs," he tells the bartender. "They really pulled out all the stops."
How did one vampire give COVID to the other one?
By coffin on him!
Happy Halloween :)
What did Matthew McConaughey say when he was turned into a zombie?
Yes, of course:
"I'll rot, I'll rot, I'll rot!"
Happy Halloween!
What do people in Seattle call a group of little kids dressed as ghosts for Halloween?
A micro-boo-ery!
Happy Halloween :)
A skeleton goes into a bar and the bartender asks,"What"ll it be Bones?"
The skeleton replies,"Two beers and a mop."
HAPPY HALLOWEEN ALL
What is a skeletons favorite snack?
Ribs.
My son wanted me to post this one too!
Happy Halloween!
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
What do you call a haunted pair of breasts?
Booooooooobies!
Happy Halloween! Stay safe everyone!
What’s 2000 lbs to a dead man?
A Skele-ton
Happy Halloween everyone!
I have a Blair Witch fetish....
I want my buddy to stand in the corner and not watch.
Happy Halloween!
What are two ghosts up to when they play together?
Pair of normal activity
Happy Halloween
Dang girl, are you a pumpkin?
Because they call me Peter Peter.
Happy Halloween!
Why did the skeleton go to the supermarket?
To get SPARE RIBS!
Happy Halloween to all the dad joke lovers out there!
The kid from the Exorcist got a ticket.
For possession.
Happy Halloween.
How did the skeleton greet the other skeleton?
Bone-jour
Happy halloween!!
Little Johnny is trick or treating
and he’s dressed like a pirate! His outfit is top to bottom swashbuckling fun, and he’s incredibly proud of all the fine details included.
He goes to the first house, knocks on the door and when the door opens he yells “twick o tweat!” The woman at the door fawns over him, she coos “oh...
Douce!
The sound of a water balloon hitting a "Trick Or Treater" square in the face.
Now try and have a Happy Halloween.
Why do witches go commando when riding around on their brooms?
Better grip.
Happy Halloween :)
you have heard "A pint is a pound" ...
.. and that is a seriously high petrol price.
I know. It's not that good. Nor even that funny.
But it's coming. Happy Halloween.
A little boy with a speech impediment goes trick or treating as a pirate...
He gets to the first house and an old lady answers the door. She says,
"Well aren't you cute. Who are you dressed as?"
He replies,
"I'm a birate! I got my barrot, my bword and my batch!" , pointing to the stuffed parrot on his shoulder, waving his sword and pointing to his eye...
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