UPJOKE

Great Dinner Jokes

A working man would come home after a week of hard work, so his wife thought that she could suprise him with a mighty dinner

So she gutted a chicken and threw it's intestines in the toilet. When the husband came home they had a great dinner and ate themselves full. After the dinner the husband stood up and said "excuse me, I need to go to the toilet" after a while the husband came back pale white a soaked with sweat. The ...

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Mocho man,,,

A typical macho man married a typical good looking lady, and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules. "I'll be home when I want, if I want, what time I want, and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table, unless I tell you that I won't be home for din...

A family decides to invite their priest over for dinner...

They have a great dinner talking about religion and how it helps with their daily lives. After dinner when the priest leaves, the wife comes back to the table to find out that one of their silver spoons is missing. The wife asks her husband if it might be the priest but the husband says that it cant...

A girl is excited to finally go on a date...

... Her date picks her up and asks her what she would like to do. She says, "Weigh me." She they go inside and she weights 135. Then they have a great dinner. He then asks, "What would you like to do now?" She says, "Weigh me." They find a pay scale and she now weights 133. They go to a movie and ea...

Bill Gates dies and goes to to the Pearly Gates.

Once there, St Peter looks throught his huge book, and finds Bills name.

"Im sorry" St Peter says. "It says here that you havent been particularly good, but, not bad either."

"It seems actually that all your good and bad deeds weight eachother out, so, there is nothing telling me if yo...

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So a guy is sunbathing nude......

as he has a very hot date later in the evening. He over sleeps and gets a terrible sunburn on his front side. He applies all of the lotion he can and heads off to the date. The couple has a great dinner and they head back to his place. The two are making out pretty heavy and she is grinding on his b...

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