The girl who works at the car rental company refuses to go out with me

and it really Hertz.

A girl agreed to go out with me after I gave her a bottle of tonic water.

Schwepped her off her feet.

Asking your crush out is easy and can be done with two simple questions: 1. "Would you go out with me?"

2. "Why not?"

This girl said she would go out with me if I knew a six letter word that's a synonym for "calm".

I said, "It's sedate."

My crush told me that she's likes me, she wants to go out with me and wants to get know me better...

Then she said "Sike"......

She said she'll go out with me when pigs can fly

But she also said men were pigs, so I don't know what she's waiting for.

30 years ago I asked the love of my life to go out with me, today I asked her to marry me.

She said no both times.

Not to brag, but every weekend, I get inundated with girls wanting to go out with me.

Edit: I meant in, undated.

"If you don't go out with me I'll jump off a 300-foot cliff."

"Sounds like a lot of bluff to me."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young Irishman was drowning his sorrow in a pub when the bartender asked what was wrong...

The young man explained that he had been madly in love with a neighbor girl for years but had been so afraid of her father that he never asked her out.

"Yesterday her father died and I finally saw my chance. I went and knocked on her door and asked if she would go out with me", he said.
<...

Why did Rita turn down a guy who asked her out?

He said "Will you go out with me........ **Señorita**?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Labrador, a Golden Retriever & a Chihuahua...

are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female poodle.

The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time. They’re speechless before her beauty, slobbering on themselves and ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Old one I’ve never seen here before: A guy is over-endowed

His extremely large penis has actually been a curse to him; women see it and refuse to try. Desperate, he hears of a witch who might be able to help him so he visits her and explains his problem.

“Indeed I know of something that could help you” she says, “It’s easy and painless. Behind my ho...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A farmer and his best friend go to the city trying to get laid...

They walk into a club and the farmer immediately finds a girl to chat. He takes his hat off and start sweet talking the girl.

Unimpressed, the girl tells him: "I'll only go out with you if you have a 2.000 acreage farm, 10 thousand cows and a 7 inch dick.

Her words make the farmer die ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The boy with the wooden eye.

There was a poor kid in Highschool who only had one eye. He couldn't afford a glass eye so he had one made out of wood. The wooden eye looked terrible and he was very self-conscious about it.

Despite his appearance he always tried to score a date with the hottest girls in school. One day in ...

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