UPJOKE

Get Out Of Jail Jokes

Courtesy of Alexa: how does a banana get out of jail?

It wins on appeal.

Why do women get out of jail sooner than men?

Because periods ends sentences.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man finally get out of jail...

...after spending 28 years on the inside for multiple felonies. And just like any other male that hasn't touched a woman after 28 years, he wanted to get some ass. Unfortunately this guy had gotten taken to jail with only $40, so that is what he had when he was released.
Without wasting anytim...

Why did the man with a stammer never get out of jail?

He couldn't finish his sentence.

So if a Chicken carries salmonella, and a Cow carries e-coli, what does a pig carry?

A gun, a badge, and a "get out of jail free" card.

I have recently become a new man

I don't drink, i smoke very rarely, i don't stare at girls, i go to sleep early, i wake up early and I work hard everyday. My supervisors are happy with me. I will definitely abandon this lifestyle once i get out of jail.

"Your money's no good here," said the bartender.

"And that 'Get Out of Jail Free' card probably won't work either."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Whenever I hear my neighbors having sex...

I think to myself, "I should get a girlfriend when I get out of jail."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Disgusting joke

This guy gets released from jail. The first thing he wants to do is eat some pussy, he loves mowin pussy. So he takes what money he has and finds a hooker. They go back to a seedy hotel and he proceeds to devour her snatch. As he starts he finds a bread crum, but flicks it aside hardly noticing. The...

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