UPJOKE

Get Inside Jokes

[OC] How did the old man get inside without knocking on the door?

The boomer-rang

When I was a kid we would get some big tires, then get inside and roll down the hill.

Those were the Goodyears.

3 drunk girls get inside a taxi

They give the driver the address. The driver knowing that they're drunk, turns the car on and off.

He turns around and says that they've arrived to their destination. The first girl pays him and gets out of the car. The second one gives him a tip and says thank you while exiting.

The t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do men love blow jobs so much?

It's the only way to get inside of a womans head!!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jewish Mom buys a new apartment

She calls her son once she is moved in and is gushing about what a nice place she has and invites him to come see it.

Of course he agrees so she starts giving him directions on how to get there.

"Once you park, head straight through the courtyard and you'll see a buzzer for the apartm...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The airplane was filled with people to the last seat, everyone was waiting for the pilot and co-pilot to arrive.

Finally they come. The people can see them through the windows, they get inside the plane and the passengers are freaked out. Both pilot and co-pilot are wearing blindfolds marking them as blind, have white canes with them and dark sunglasses. The people freak out a bit, but after both of them get i...

How many claustrophobics can screw in a lightbulb?

I don’t know I can’t convince any to get inside.

A bar is burning to the ground, and a team of firefighters rush in to put it out.

A bar is burning to the ground and a team of firefighters rush in to put out the fire. When they get inside they see an Irishman passed out from smoke inhalation. They drag him out of the bar and eventually the Irishman comes to. The firefighter says "you were there, how did this whole thing get...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two guys in brothel

Two young guys come to the brothel, they knock on the door and sliding peephole opens

Man with gruff voice asks : What do you want?

Guys : To get inside

Man : How much money you got

Guys, after going trough their pockets : erm ... 20$

Man laughs : For that much you...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ladies, if you feel like your man just doesn't understand you, the best thing to do is to give him a blowjob.

It's the quickest way for him to get inside your head.

A reporter hears about a new cafe that is a smash hit

He heads on down to see a long line of women outside, all waiting to get inside. Making his way inside, he is shocked to see Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top Fame standing behind the counter, serving tea. He walks up and asks "Hey, aren't you Billy Gibbons?"\\

"Sure am."

"Are the other guys her...

How many contortionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

At least two, but they may need some time to get inside it.

I drank a little too much at the bar last night, so I walked home...

Stumbled, actually. I was messing around with the keys and couldn't open the front door. After a few minutes a cop rolled up, got out of the car and asked if I was OK. "Yes, officer, just a little drunk, and trying to get into my house here" The officer asked if I was sure this was my house. "Of cou...

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