UPJOKE

Gas Bill Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I sell manure to pay my gas bill...

Shit gets me heated

An old lady asks God for help.

In the highlands of Scotland lives an elderly lady in a house outside a small village. A harsh winter is coming and the lady is very worried she can’t pay the gas bill that winter. With no family left, she turns to God and she decides to write him a letter.

“Dear God,
In your endless merc...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What gave Hitler a heart attack?

Seeing his gas bill

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did Hitler blows his brains out?...

Because he saw his gas bill.

Also this joke isn't funny, one of my family members died in a concentration camp.

He went to take a piss and fell out of a tower.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is the difference between a Tesla and Hitler

Tesla has no gas bills

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hitlers suicide

A man is sitting next to his jewish wife and decided to tell a joke:

Man: why did Hitler kill himself?

Woman: I don't know. Why did he?

Man: He saw the gas bill!

Woman: agh that is so insensitive.

Man: I know...My grand father died in the Holocaust.

Woman: a...

Shipwrecked

A married couple were enjoying a luxury South Sea cruise until their liner was shipwrecked and they were washed ashore on a desert island, the only survivors.

Day after day, they looked hopefully out to sea in the hope of spotting a passing vessel but none came. As boredom set in, they star...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When did Hitler decide it was time to Commit Suicide?

He expected to pay the price, but when that final gas bill came in, he said fuck this.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Q: Why did Hitler cry when he got to heaven?

A: God gave him his gas bill.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dogski staggers home late one night after drinking about a thousand beers. When he comes into the bedroom, he discovers his wife lying half-naked on the bed, and a strange man in the act of removing his pants. ...

...
"For the last time, lady," says the man, thinking furiously, "if
you don't pay your gas bill right now, I'll shit on the floor!"

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.