UPJOKE

Full Mouth Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three friends are walking down the sidewalk and see something in their path that looks like shit, but they aren't sure.

Al leans down and takes a whiff. "It smells like shit".

Bob reaches down and presses two fingers into it. "Hmm, it feels like shit."

Carl asks for a piece and begins to chew it. With a full mouth he declares, "Well, it sure tastes like shit."

Al then reasons out loud, "So it loo...

A Man and A Woman Meet On an Elevator

" Where are you heading today? " The man asks.
" I'm going down to give blood. "
" How much do you get paid to give blood? "
" About $20. "
" Wow, says the man, "I'm going to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100. " The woman angrily gets off the elevator.


The next day, t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"So there's a man in an elevator, and as the doors are closing, he sees this young, fine looking lady hurriedly make her way to the elevator too, so he stops the doors and lets her get on.

'Where are you headed?' he asks, standing by the buttons.

'Oh, I'm going to the clinic on the fourth floor,' the lady says, 'I'm going to go donate some eggs and make a quick hundred dollars.'

At this, the man starts to chuckle.

'What's so funny?'

'Well, it's just that I'...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman is donating some blood to make a little extra money . . .

She heads to the hospital and gets on the elevator with a man about her age. They say hello and she tells him she is heading to the 4th floor and asks if he would push the button for her. He clicks the button and also hits the 6th floor button for himself. A few weeks later the woman returns to the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man enters an elevator...

which is already occupied by a young woman, who has already pushed the button for the 2nd floor.

Woman: Are you going to the 2nd floor?

Man: No, 3rd floor. What's on the 2nd floor?

Woman: A blood bank, they pay $20 for a donation.

Man: Well, the sperm bank on the 3rd floo...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.