UPJOKE

Four Word Jokes

What are four words you DEFINITELY do not want to hear?

"Hi. I'm Chris Wallace."

I can sum up 2016 in four words

Two thousand and sixteen

What four words can completely destroy a man's confidence?

Is it in yet?

2020 in four words

...then things got worse.

what's a four word definition for short?

Is it in yet?

I got four words for you buddy

I don’t understand how numbers work

Only a genius can say these four words four times really fast

# EYE, YAM, STEW, PEED











Tell me if you get it

What four words would break Reddit's heart?

Mr. Rogers touched me.

Four word joke

Boy scouts. Girl guides.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

TIFU and heard the four words you never want to hear during sex... "Call me an ambulance"

So I said, "You're an ambulance."

Which four words can give you an Irish accent?

Whale

oil

beef

hooked.

What four words is Siri most tired of hearing?

"Hey Siri, Open Google"

What are the last four words a redneck says before he commits suicide?

Hey guys, watch this!

An Oil Prospector Died and went to Heaven

And St. Peter said, "Well, I checked you out, and you meet all of the qualifications. But there’s one problem."

"We have some tough zoning laws up here, and we keep all of the oil prospectors over in that pen. And as you can see, it is absolutely chock-full. There is no room for you.’"
...

Worst wifi password ever.

USER: What's the wifi password?

TECH: fourwordsalluppercase

USER: [typing] FOUR WORDS ALL UPPERCASE

TECH: No. It's one word, all lowercase.

USER: [typing] onewordalllowercase

TECH: [screaming] NO, it's "fourwordsalluppercase"! ONE WORD, ALL LOWERCASE!!!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I entered a gameshow to win a million dollars...

The gameshow required guessing the unknown using your five senses.

In round one, I stuck my hand into a covered box and guess what was inside by feel. Without hesitation I knew it was seaweed and tinfoil. I would know that feeling anywhere.

In round two, we were paired and had to guess...

Keep it simple stupid

Drill sgt. looks at the recruits at basic and says, “I’m going to give you four important words in the Army and you need to make a sentence as quick as possible. The four words are; defense, defeat, deduct, and detail. Pri’ate Johnson, go!” Johnson just stares at the drill blankly. “Boom, you’re dea...

An oil prospector is waiting at the gates of heaven.

St. Peter had some bad news for an oil prospector who appeared at the pearly gates of heaven: “You’re qualified for admission,” said St. Peter, “but, as you can see, the section for oil prospectors is packed. There’s no way to fit you in.”

After a moment, the prospector asked to say just four...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

e.e. cummings walks into a store

e.e. cummings went into a store to buy 17 pounds worth of goods. he forgot his wallet, but he took his pen and wrote four words down on an accounting ledger. i'm not gonna tell you what the words were, but they paid the bill and he got two vowels and a capital back.

A jewish man's wife dies

So he decides to place an obituary in the newspaper, and phones their agent.

"Just put 'Sarah died' in the paper."

"But Sir, for the same money of only one line, you can add another four words!"

"Oh. Let me think about that.."

He phones back a few minutes later and says...

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