UPJOKE

First Impressions Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three sisters were all getting married within a short time period...

...Mum was a bit worried about how their sex life would get started and made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a few words on their first impressions of marital sex.

The first girl sent a card from Hawaii two days after the wedding.

The card said nothing but: ...

Foot fetishists are great at first impressions.

They always get off on the right foot.

I always hate when I move to a new neighborhood because I'm forced to meet all my new neighbors and I'm terrible with first impressions. Ive never had anyone talk to me again after the first time.

All I ever say is, "Hi. My name is Eric Smith and I'm a registered child molester."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Priest and the Politician

A parish priest was being honored at a dinner on the twenty-fifth anniversary of his arrival in that parish. A leading local politician, who was a member of the congregation, was chosen to make the presentation and give a little speech at the dinner, but he was delayed in traffic, so the priest ...

You shouldn't judge a book by its cover...

Unless it's a book about making good first impressions.

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