UPJOKE

First Friday Jokes

John Smith was the only Protestant to move into the large Catholic neighborhood.

On the first Friday of Lent, John was outside grilling a big juicy steak on his grill. Meanwhile all of his neighbors were eating cold tuna fish for supper. This went on each Friday during Lent.

On the last Friday of Lent the neighborhood men got together and decided that something just HAD t...

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Oh, Little Johnny

Little Johnny's teacher began the school year by announcing a new contest. Every Friday, 30 minutes before the final bell, she would ask the class a question. The first student to answer it right could leave early, and the rest of the class would take a quiz.

The first Friday, the teacher a...

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Little Johnny

One day a teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that every Friday she will ask a question to the class and whoever answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday.

On the first Friday the teacher asks: "How many grains of sand are on the beach?" needl...

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My fallback joke that I've been telling for about 20 years at this point.

A teacher isn't seeing much engagement in her class so, she decides to get the students more involved she offers up a proposition.

She tells all of her students that every Friday she is going to ask a "Question of the Day", if the students can get it right they can take the day off of school ...

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Four buddies are standing around a barbecue...

They are all married and somehow the conversation shifts to how often each of them gets to have sex with their wives.

The first guy looks at his shoes and mutters “my wife only lets me have sex with her on the first Friday on the month.”

The next guy pipes up, “my wife and I have sex ...

My favorite Lent joke

An atheist named John lived in a small Christian village. During lent on every Friday he would grill a deer and the whole village could smell it.

After a few years the village elders got together and said this has to stop and they need to convert John.

The elders eventually convince ...

Tuba Lessons (warning, long build up)

A father once desired for his layabout son to do something... anything... with his life in an effort to improve his condition. The child had no academic acumen, nor any athletic talent, so the father decided to get the child involved in the arts. "Which musical insturment," he demanded one day, "wou...

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