UPJOKE

Fight Me Jokes

Someone tried to fight me because I bought the last steak.

I told him, "I don't have any beef with you."

This one time a Persian guy tried to fight me

Iran

1960s Batman Phase (Original Joke Fight Me Reposters)

A director wanted to make a movie about Batman, but sadly D.C. wouldn't allow him to film it. So he decided he will just make the movie but instead of using the character's real names he would just take away the last letter of their names. Batman became Batma and he fought crime with his trusty part...

A drunk homeless guy wanted to fight me yesterday

As soon as he kicked me and lost his shoe I could smell defeat.

I ran across some douchbag millennial in the store running his mouth, calling me a boomer and blaming me for ruining the world. Then he acted like he wanted to fight me.

I said "That's pretty big talk for a guy with no health insurance."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A tattoo artist went to a coffee place and ordered coffee but forgot his wallet...

so he tells the woman at the counter that he can't pay for it. The woman gets angry at first and then asks "What can we do about this situation?" The tattoo artist says "Well I can give you a tattoo for free instead and we can call it even". The woman thinks for a while, reluctantly agrees to it and...

My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death

"Jokes on you" I said "if I die in battle I'll go straight to Valhalla"

I attended a self-defence course.

At the end of it, the person that ran the course said, "Ok, buddy, so for the week you owe me...£380."

"I refuse to pay," I told him.

"You have to," he insisted.

"Well then, you'll have to fight me for it."

So we fought, and he absolutely battered me. Left me bloody, brui...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was in 5th grade..

..I ran from a fight. My Grandma said "You fight back or you fight me!"

I whooped her ass that day.

A dog wakes up at the vet

The dog asks "Where am I?" The vet answers "At the vet, you have just been neutered!"

The dog replies angrily "fight me!"

"you don't have the balls"

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