UPJOKE

Female Bartender Jokes

How do you know if a female bartender hates you?

There is a string hanging out of your Bloody Mary!

a woman walks into a bar and takes a seat across from the female bartender

"I'll take a shot of anything, I'm celebrating taking the Bechdel test."

The bartender pours her a whiskey and says, "think you'll pass?"

"I just did!" she says as she downs the shot.

A dumb billionaire walks into a bar and orders a pint. The female bartender notices how attractive he is and slips him her number on a tissue.

" Preposterous! I could get laid for this much!"

So my bf and I walk into a bar. We notice this guy kept hitting on the female bartender by telling her corny jokes as she fake chuckles.

One joke involved him asking her why no one trusted atoms. (Because they make up everything). My bf retaliates with his own joke... 'What do female bartenders like most about their male Patrons?.... Just the tip' 😎

A blind man walks into a bar. He sits down at the bar and the female bartender walks up and asks what he wants.

He orders a beer and asks the bartender if she wants to hear a blonde joke?

She says “Hold on buddy. You clearly are not aware, but this bar is completely staffed by women. And I’m a blonde, the woman you’re sitting next to is blonde, and the bouncer behind you is blonde. You sure you still w...

A salesman walks into a bar and and asks the female bartender what the specials are...

She says it’s $5 for a club sandwich and $20 for a bj. Salesman looks at her and and asks her “do you give hand jobs?” To which she responds “Yes that’s $15.”

Salesman looks and her, slips her a $10 and says “that’s $5 for the sandwich and another $5 for you to wash your hands before you mak...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My grandfather, an 83 year old doctor that still practices, sent me this jokes. Enjoy.

An old golfer comes in from a round of golf at a new course and heads into the grill room. As he passes through the swinging doors he sees a sign hanging over the bar : COLD BEER: $2.00 HAMBURGER: $2.25 CHEESEBURGER: $2.50 CHICKEN SANDWICH : $3.50 HAND JOB: $50.00
Checking his wallet to be sure h...

Three strings are going out drinking...

But sadly, they live in a world where strings aren't allowed to drink. They are tired of this lifestyle, however, and they want to have their drinks no matter what, so they head out to the local bars. At the first bar they come to, they try to be straight up about it. The strings walk up to the b...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A german man is having vacation in Africa

He gets in a bar and sits on a table. Shortly after, the female bartender comes and serves him. As he drinks his beer he recognises some scratches in the table about 30cm from the edge.
As the bartender came again he asked: "Why are there these scratches?"
Bartender:"Yesterday 3 black men came...

Stopped for a beer on my way home from work...

Stopped for a beer on the way home and overheard this interaction

Female bartender: It's funny that you call it a squirt bottle instead of a spray bottle

Male bartender: Well all bottles can squirt... They just have to be comfortable with themselves...

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