UPJOKE

End Of The Year Jokes

I had a goal to lose 20 Pounds by the end of the year.

30 pounds to go

What does a drug dealer says at the end of the year?

Merry cryst meth!

Our backstage manager is leaving at the end of the year. He has been an outstanding member of our theatre team.

Props to him

Yesterday, I looked in the fridge and figured I had enough milk to last to the end of the year.

Today, I'm not so sure.

At the end of the year I'm just gonna give up and say

2021

Did you see that Walmart will be closing about 500 stores by the end of the year...?

It's going to put about 12 cashiers out of work.

My school does these things at the end of the year called "Senior Pranks".

Usually the same routine, with some alterations each year. Pull the fire alarm, play inappropriate music over the loud speaker, and throw a couple smoke bombs here and there. I'm always surprised how the local retirement home doesn't threaten to sue anyone.

I met a fortune teller and he gave me a calendar as a little gift.

What a lovely thought, it's just a shame there's five months missing at the end of the year.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy and a talking dog

A young boy goes off to college.

Half way through the semester, having foolishly squandered all his money .... he calls home.

"Dad" he says, "You won't believe what modern education is developing!

They actually have a program here in our institution that will teach our dog, Jack...

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