Dolly Parton Jokes - 26 Hilarious Dolly Parton Jokes

Dolly Parton no longer speaks to her bra designer.

Not since the two fell out.

My friend Joe recently started the Dolly Parton diet

It’s really made Joe lean, Joe lean, Jo lean, Joe leeeaaaannn

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Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates

Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day.

They both met with an Angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven.

The angel said "Unfortunately, there's only one space in Heaven today so I must decide which one of you will be admitted."

T...

What do you have when Dolly Parton is doing the backstroke?

Islands in the stream.

Why are Dolly Parton’s feet so small?

They don’t get any sun.

The Dolly Parton Diet

A guy walks into a bar and orders a light beer. "How's your New Year's diet coming along?" the bartender asks. "It's going okay, but I'm not losing as much as my buddy Joe. He went on that new Dolly Parton diet," the guy says. "It's made Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe lean."

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There were a couple of strange items at the estate sale of a eccentric collector. One was a couple of Dolly Parton's used bras, the other King Edwards used Enema...

The appraiser was surprised that they sold at all, especially the used enema, as it still had fecal matter on it. What surprised him most is that the enema actually sold for more money than the bras. The auctioneer wasn't surprised at all because he plays poker and knows that a royal flush always ...

Why did Dolly Parton refuse to have tea with Kate Middleton?

Because high tea is always 4pm and she works 9 to 5.

Lame. But this was in the news the other week. Dolly actually did refuse to have tea with Kate.....there's a joke here, somewhere. Do you have it?

Went into a shop to purchase Dolly Parton's Greatest Hits

And I was given a magazine in a plain brown paper bag.

Dolly Parton just announced she's buying Big Lots, Piggly Wiggly, and Harris Teeter.

She's combining them to open a superstore called Big Wiggly Teeters.

Dolly Parton just got a dose of her own medicine.

Literally.

Did you know Dolly Parton wrote Joleen & I will always love you in the same day?

Seems like with her great things come in pairs

Why did Dolly Parton get pulled over by the police on her way to work?

.

.

She was going 9-to-5 (mph)!

TIL Dolly Parton has small feet...

I guess nothing grows in the shade.

Dolly Parton's made a major move into the grocery business...

She bought the chains Piggly Wiggly, Giant and Harris Teeter, and is going to rename them "Giant Wiggly Teeters".

Dolly Parton has invested $1m in the Moderna covid vaccine

It's working 9 to 5 perecent of the time, what a way to keep us living

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Dolly Parton and Princess Diana are at the pearly gates of Heaven...

St Peter, standing guard, asks them to share their contributions with him. Dolly Parton lifts her shirt and shows him her . Then Princess Diana takes a cup, pees in it, and hands it to St Peter. St Peter asks them to hold on for a moment and then walks away. When he returns, he lets Princess Di...

What does Dolly Parton put in her swimming pool?

Chlorine chlorine chlorine chlorineeeee

How do you pick Dolly Parton's Kids out of a crowd?

They're the ones with stretch marks around their lips.

I had a nightmare last nigh

I dreamed I was Dolly Parton's baby and she was bottle feeding me.

Dolly Parton is such a beloved figure in America, the DSM-5 has already classified a disease that American's might feel when she dies.

Post-Parton Depression

Me and my flat chested wife went to see a marriage counsellor today.

The counsellor asked us; "What seems to be the problem?"

"Well," I said, "Dolly Parton here thinks I'm too sarcastic."

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Just bought my new car stereo, which is voice activated.

If I shout "country" it plays Dolly Parton, if I shout "rock" it plays Guns and Roses. I was driving through town the other day when some children ran out in front of me, I shouted " KIDS!" and it started playing Michael Jackson.

When are people.....

When is someone going to tell Dolly Parton that 9+5 don’t make eleven?

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Looking for similar jokes to 'Does a bear in the woods?'

Hey /r/jokes,

Looking for some sarcastic one liners. All I got so far is:

* Does a bear in the woods?
* Is the pope catholic?
* Is grass green?
* Is the sky blue?
* Is the tin-mans made of sheet metal?
* Does Dolly Parton sleep on her back?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A calculator joke...

From my childhood.

69 doctors said Dolly Partons were
222 big, they sent her to
51 street to see doctor
x (multiply) He told her to take a pill for
8 days, and that left her....

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