UPJOKE

Dog Licking Jokes

Two dumb guys are walking down the street and they see a dog licking himself

One says, "I wish I could do that". And the other replies, "maybe if you tried petting him first"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Englishmen are walking down the road when they see a dog licking it's own testicles

One of Englishmen say

"Golly, I wish I could do that"

The second bloke responds

"That's odd. You don't know him well enough to do it"

Two teenage boys are walking down an alley

when they see a stray dog licking its crotch.

The one boy says, “Man, I really wish I could do that.”

His friend responds, “I don’t know, you’d better pet him and see if he’s friendly, first.”

Two elderly gentlemen sipping their beer outside a pub...

One points to a dog licking its genitals and says:

"Hey Bert, I wish I could do that"

Bert marks a pause, and replies:

"Well, I'm sure he'd let you if you gave him a biscuit"

Old men on porch

Two old men are setting on a porch, shooting the breeze. In the corner, there is a n old mangy dog licking himself. The younger of the two looks at his friend, “Man, I wish I could do that!” His friend looks at him, shaking his head, “ That dog will bite yoouuu!!!”

My dad and his friend...

Were driving down the road one day and they came up to a stop sign. They were about to take off when suddenly his friend said...

Friend: Hey look at that dog licking his balls.

Dad: Yeah... You don't see that everyday I guess.

Friend: Man I wish I could do that you know?

...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Englishmen are strolling down a London street,

when they see a stray dog licking its own testicles.

One of the Englishmen turns to the other and says, "Say, I wish I could do that!"

His mate watches the dog for a moment, sighs longingly,
and replies,

"I should say so! But don't you think you ought to get to know him fi...

Two Drunk Englishmen

...were walking down a street, late at night when the come across a dog licking it's own bollocks.

The first Englishmen points to the dog and says "I wish I could do that"

The second Englishman looks at the dog, and says "I reckon you could, but you better ask it permission first!"

Two guys driving down the road

They see a dog licking his balls.
One guy says:
"Man I wish I could do that"
The other guy says:
"Man he'd bite you"

From a song I like and probably somebody's grandpa. Definitely can picture an old man telling this joke.

Two guys are driving...

...when they stop at a red light next to a park. The passenger looks over and sees a dog licking his groin. He says to the driver "Man, I wish I could do that." The driver says "You may want to pet the dog first."

So a man and a wife were walking....

The wife sees a dog licking itself and whispers to her husband
"I wish I could get down like that."
The husband replies "I suggest you ask if you can pet em first"

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