UPJOKE

Disney Land Jokes

What does women breast and Disney land have in common?

They are made for kids but adults enjoy them!

I made my own identical copy of Disney Land and only charge visitors a quarter of what Disney does.

It’s more fun than it has any rights to be.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

**News Flash** Snow White has been kicked out of Disney Land!!

She sat on Pinocchio's face and said, "Lie you bastard, lie!".

Chernobyl is just like Disney land

The only difference? The 7 foot mouse is actually real.

When I die I'd like my remains to be scattered at Disney Land...

Also, I don't want to be cremated.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear Snow White got thrown out of Disney Land?

They caught her sitting on Pinocchio's Face yelling "Lie you little fucker

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do Disney Land and Viagra have in common?

They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two minute ride.

Hellen Keller was the first person to go to Disney land.

Don't worry, she didn't know it either.

A man on his deathbed is telling his friend his final wishes

Man: I have two final wishes

Friend: what are they?

Man: firstly I'd like my remains scattered over Disney Land

Friend: and?

Man: secondly, I don't want to be cremated.

Boy talking to Grandpa.

Boy: Grandpa can you make a noise like a frog?

Grandpa: No I can't, why do you ask?

Boy: Well Grandma said I can go to Disney Land when you croak..

Why does Scottish Mickey Mouse no longer use his helicopter?

It Disney land.

Ukraine has announced plans to open Chernobyl as a theme park.

They say it will be just like Disney land

Except the 6 foot mouse is real

The boy and his pet caterpillar

A boy has a pet caterpillar and he asks him "Mr. Caterpillar, would you like to go see a movie with me?"

"Sure," says the caterpillar, "let me get ready."

So the boy goes outside and waits. And he waits, and waits all day, eventually in to the night and the movie is long over.

T...

I knew this guy who was so dumb...

he saw a road sign that said, "Disney Land Left", so he turned around and went home.

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