UPJOKE

Deep Thoughts Jokes

Deep thoughts

I wonder what fish tasted like before women started swimming.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Deep thoughts

Do cows know that we drink their milk or do they think we just like playing with their tits?

I was sitting on the roof of my bus depot thinking deep thoughts when the cops arrested me.

Apparently they didn't want me getting ideas above my station.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Deep Thoughts

Do you think that, when two police officers are having sex, they appreciate the fact that they are copulating?

Think deep thoughts when committing suicide in the ocean.

Just let that idea sink in a few minutes.

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed.

She puts on her dressing gown and goes downstairs to look for him.

She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him.

He appears to be in deep thoughts​, just staring
at the wall.

She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip o...

I hope that if I ever get rich I won't be mean to poor people

Like I am now

(Dark, I know, but one of my favorite deep thoughts)

Don’t criticize someone until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes...

...that way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away and have their shoes.

-Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

Wish

Translated from my language, might contain mistakes, I apologize in advance.


Guy was walking on the beach and saw an Aladdin Lamp buried in the sand. He grabbed it, rubbed it till it got clean and genie came out and told him:

-You have freed me from the lamp, I can make one wish c...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.