Day Off Work Jokes - 5 Hilarious Day Off Work Jokes

Saint Peter decides to take a day off work, and Jesus takes his place

Saint Peter decides to take a day off work, and Jesus takes his place. St. Peter explains that he should ask any person who comes to the gates a little about themselves before they enter. Then you decide whether or not they should be allowed into heaven.

It's a slow day, but most people are a...

Why did the zombie take a day off work?

He was feeling really rotten.

John took the day off work to play golf

When he got to the golf course, the attendant said they were pretty busy and wanted to pair him up with Steve to play together. The two guys headed out and after a few holes were getting frustrated by two women ahead of them playing really slow. Eventually, John said it was getting ridiculous and ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man knocks on the door and asks the woman " Do you have a ? "

A woman hears a knock on the door and when she opens the door a man asks this.

Man: Do you have a ?

Woman slams the door in disgust

The next morning she hears a knock again and answers the door. The man asks the same question
Man: do you have a ?

She slams ...

Hey Boss, can I take the day off work? I am going to be a father.

Boss: Of course

*Next day

Boss: so is the baby a boy or a girl?

Me: I’ll let you know in 9 months!

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