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Cut Wood Jokes

I can cut wood using just my eyes

It is true, I saw it with my own eyes

Good one from my dad: "I can cut wood by just looking at it"

Came up during a conversation about having a bonfire

Dad "Here's something you might not have known about me, I can cut wood by just looking at it"

Me, fully expecting a dad joke: "I don't believe you but would you care to elaborate"

Dad: "It's true! I saw it with my own eyes"...

Two lumberjacks are having a conversation.

One of them says "You know, I can cut wood just by looking at it!"

The other replies "That's not possible! I don't believe you!"

The first says "I know, that it's hard to believe, but I'm telling you! I saw it with my two eyes!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[Long] There was a man named Joe, a carpenter who made incredible furniture

He lived in a small city, but it was always full of people trying to buy furniture from Joe's store, Arge Oaks. Every Saturday Joe would go out into the forest to cut wood for his furniture. One Saturday Joe decided to go further out into the forest, in order to see the older and larger trees. He ca...

Redneck Job seekers

2 redneck brothers are going to an employment agency

The counselor asks the 1st redneck "do you have any special skills?"

He replies "I'm a pilot."

She says "oh that's wonderful! There is a high demand for good pilots. if you go down to the airport you will have no problem f...

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