UPJOKE

Court Judge Jokes

A District Court judge, a Circuit Court judge, and a Supreme Court justice are sitting at a bar

The District Court judge says, "I interpret the Constitution the way I read it."

The Circuit Court judge says, "I interpret the Constitution the way it's written."

The Supreme Court justice says, "The Constitution isn't anything, until I interpret it."

(original joke was three u...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mickey and Minnie Mouse Are in Divorce Court

The Divorce Court Judge has just finished reviewing Mickey's petition for divorce when he says to Mickey, "Now let me get this straight, you say you want to divorce Minnie Mouse because she's crazy?".

Mickey, visibly upset and very emotional responds to the judge: "No, No, No Your Honor. I d...

How is your password like an emotional family court judge?

They're both case sensitive.

Divorce court judge: "Sir, I'm awarding your wife $650 a month alimony."

"That's great, your honor. And I'll send her a little something too."

I wanted to be a high-court judge so was studying law, but I got kicked out for vigilantism

Turns out you can't have your cape and edict too

TIL Supreme Court judge kidnapped by cannibals in the Caribbean!

Justice was served.

A divorce court judge said to the husband:

"Mr Geraghty, I have reviewed this case very carefully and I've decided to give your wife 800 dollars a week." "That's very fair, your honour," he replied. "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mickey Mouse files for divorce

The divorce court judge says "Micky, I can't determine from your statement whether the grounds for divorce are insanity or infidelity."

Mickey says, "your honor, I don't know how it could be more clear, Minnie Mouse is fucking goofy."

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.