The Complexities of Language

So on the first day of class, a Havard language professor says: "In English double negatives can become positives. But in some languages, like Russian, a double negative stays negative. But there is not one language in which a double positive becomes negative."
Then a student in the back shouts "...

Matthew McConaughey walked into a deli to order a sandwich

“What can I get for you?” the shopkeep asked.

Matthew replied, “well my good man, you see I’ve had the good fortune of becoming a world renown celebrity, an academy award winning actor, I’ve played some of the most iconic roles in television history, and I’m even known for my whimsical yet c...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A horse walks into a bar...

... and the barman says "Why the long face?"
The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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