This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many Freudians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw the lightbulb and the other to hold the penis... I mean mother.... I mean ladder.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many grammar nazis does it take to change a lightbulb

Too

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb?

How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers ...

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they beat the room for being black and arrest the bulb for being broke.

How many antivaxxers does it take to change a lightbulb?

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It's not my job to give you the answer. Do your own research.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many guys in the friendzone does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they just stand around and compliment it, and then get pissed when it won't screw

How many influencers does it take yo change a lightbulb?

One, but it will take 300 videos, over 10 hours and they will stop to comment every eight of a turn.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb?

More than 7, bc my basement is still dark...

How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. Trump says it’s done and they all cheer in the dark.

How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one but it takes 15 episodes.

How many Kennedy's does it take to change a lightbulb?

Trick Question

We all know Kennedy's don't last as long as lightbulbs.

How many redditors on r/jokes does it take to change a lightbulb?

87.

1 to install the replacement and 86 to point out it’s already been used before.

How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?

It's a really obscure number, you've probably never heard of it.

How many boomers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None.

They’ll all resist change even if it means making the world a brighter place.

How do you get Donald Trump to change a lightbulb?

You tell him Barack Obama installed it.

How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They're afraid of change- even if it makes the world a brighter place.

(Edit: Folks, take a breath. It is a joke.)

(Edit: Thanks for the silver, gold, and plats)

How many of Shakespeare's characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three. One to change the lightbulb, one to contemplate how a lightbulb is as mortal as any human, and one to spend the afternoon debating whether to murder his uncle.

How many journalists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three:

One to report it as an inspired government program to bring light to the poor.
One to report it as a conspiracy to deprive the poor of darkness.
And one to win a Pulitzer Prize for reporting that the electric company hired someone to break the lightbulb in the first place.
...

How do boomers change a lightbulb

They dont, they just keep talking about how great the old one was

How many capitalists are needed to change a lightbulb?

None. Capitalists are not _needed_ for anything. They just tagged along to ask for lighting subsidies

How many Nintendo fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Who knows? They’re all too busy playing with the switch.

How many writers for "The Simpsons" does is take to change a lightbulb?

None. They won't admit that it burnt out 15 years ago!

How many mystery novel writers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in almost all the way, and another one to give it a surprising twist at the end.

How many Game of Thrones seasons does it take to change a lightbulb?

Eight, if you want to screw it completely.

How many lawyers do you need to change a lightbulb?

Three.

One to climb the ladder, another one to shake it, and a third one to sue the manufacturer of the ladder.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb?

Let's go ride our bikes!

Can any redditor change a lightbulb on Valentine's Day?

Yes, since it needs only a single one to do it.

I had to get on the ladder to change a lightbulb in the garage this afternoon.

You could say it was the high light of my day.

How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Such number as may be deemed to perform the stated task in a timely and efficient manner within the strictures of the following agreement:

Whereas the party of the first part, also known as “Lawyer,” and the party of the second part, also known as “Light Bulb,” do hereby and forthwith agree t...

How many American voters does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don’t know, trump won’t let me count them all.

How does a guitarist change a lightbulb?

Like anyone else. And other guitarists say "Van Halen would have changed it better".

RIP

How long does it take someone who doesn't understand astronomical measurements to change a lightbulb?

A lightyear

How does a Karen change a lightbulb?

She doesn’t screw it in, because the world is supposed to revolve around her

How many Nevadans does it take to change a lightbulb?

E

How many McDonalds workers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, because they can't climb the ladder.

*Edit: Wasn't my joke, it was a friends but I can't credit him since I don't know his account name*

How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Six, one to change it and the other five to say how they could do it better.

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to assure the public that they’re doing everything they can to fix the issue while the other screws the bulb into a faucet.

how many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None; they're content to wander around in the dark pretending everything's okay.

How many divorced men does it take to change a lightbulb?

We wouldn’t know, the women always get to keep the house.

How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.

Edit: Wow front page. Didn't expect this big a response.

How many country musicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Four.

One to actually change the lightbulb and three to sing a song about how good the old one used to be.

How many tumblrinas does it take to change a lightbulb?

You may think that a burnt out bulb needs to change just because the room is too dark *for you* to see anything, so it *must* be changed, but I don't care, it's beautiful, you should respect its right to be burnt out and learn to be more accepting of darker rooms, check your filament privileges you ...

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