UPJOKE

Car Ride Jokes

What does an adventurous baker give you during a car ride?

Road bread.

What do you call it when you film a long car ride in a movie?

A limo-scene

True Story. So my grandpa, my father and I were out on a car ride to the beach when I was 11.

I always loved riding with my grandpa because he told all of his war stories from serving in WWII, and as a kid they were always cool to hear.

We stopped at a stop sign, and a car with 3 asian kids pulled up behind us ( maybe 18/19 year olds) and immediately started blaring the horn. My gran...

Car ride

Did you hear they finally made a device that makes cars run 95% quieter? Yeah, it fits right over her mouth.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Where does Sean Connery sit when he goes for a car ride?

He shits in the front

What kind of bug do you find on a long car ride?

An I-shoulda-pede.

Quarantine has turned us into dogs.

We roam the house all day looking for food. We are told "no" if we get too close to strangers. And we get really excited about car rides.

How does a tail pipe feel after a long car ride?

exhausted.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Jimmy on a car ride with Grandpa

Little Jimmy and his grad dad were driving down the highway when a bug splatters against the window.

Grandpa : You see that Jim! What do you think was the last thing that went though that bugs head when he hit the window?

Jimmy : His ass

A guy goes to a pet shops and goes to the cashier and says..

I need a pet, and I want something different. My bird died and he was great and all but he stopped talking at the end of his life. The cashier says I have just the thing for you, a talking centipede.

The man was surprised, but he said what the heck and bought the talking centipede.

O...

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