UPJOKE

Captain Morgan Jokes

Why did Captain Morgan wear a hat that came halfway down the side of his head?

Because of his privateers!

Why does Captain Morgan always have his foot on a barrel of rum?

Because he can barrely stand.



This is a reupload of my post from earlier due to a misspell that ruined the joke.

How does the siren like her Captain Morgan?

On the rocks...

What noise does Captain Morgan's chainsaw make?

RUMMRUMRUMRUMRUMRUMRUMRUM

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic from the bartender...

The bartender places an apple in front of him. "This isn't a gin and tonic!" the man says angrily. The bartender says "oh but it is. This is a magic apple. Just take a bite."

The guy takes a bite. "That tastes just like gin!" The bartender grins and says "turn it around..." the guy does so an...

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?

Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Captain Morgan now facing sexual assault accusations. Local authorities asking victims one question.

Have you had a little Captain in you?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, "Will you marry me?" The Princess immediately said, "No!"

And the Prince lived happily ever after, and rode motorcycles and dated thin, long-legged, full-breasted women and hunted and fished and raced cars, and went to titty bars and dated ladies half his age and drank whiskey, beer, and Captain Morgan, and never heard bitching and never paid child support...

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