UPJOKE

But When I Do It Jokes

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It's amazing, when a dog licks its own anus it's perfectly normal. But when I do it...

I get arrested for bestiality.

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I hate double-standards; when my girlfriend puts on a pair of puppy-dog eyes, it's "cute", but when I do it...

Everyone is just "Oh god Mercury what the fuck did you do that puppy?!"

So it’s ok when a season does it…

How come when spring comes early everyone gets excited, but when I do it my wife cheats on me with the neighbor.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So sick of double standards these days.

When a dog licks his balls in public, nobody says anything. But when I do it, people yell "what are you doing to your dog, you sick fuck?"

Sick and tired of the double standards

When Venus poses naked on a giant scallop shell she is "beautiful" and "a goddess".

But when I do it I am "drunk" and "banned from the Sea Life Centre".

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