The pirate joke (This isn't my joke)

A pirate Captain is surveying his crew on Deck as they set out to see on a long voyage. He notices a new lad mopping the deck and decides to greet him.
"I welcome you to our long endeavor on the high sea" said the captain
"Thank you cap'n sir" said the crew lad, but then followed. "Uh sir... I...

A tourist walks into a bar.

He asks for an Irishman named Seamus. The bartender points to an old man in the back, staring out the window and nursing a pint.

The tourist takes a seat next to Seamus. "Is it true, what they say about you?" He offers the old man a fresh pint.

Seamus smiles at the man, then curls back...

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