UPJOKE

Broken Window Jokes

What did the window washer say to the broken window?

I feel your pane.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(Slightly NSFW) Man says to his wife that he is going golfing. She gets upset because she thought they would spend the day together.

Husband says to his wife that he is going golfing. She gets upset because she thought they would spend the day together.

Husband: "honey just give me the day I need to relieve some stress. Besides You don't even golf."

Wife: "I want to learn and besides it's something we can do toget...

Broken Window

Wife: You need to fix the bathroom window, then neighbor can see me every time I shower.
Husband; I know, he saw you and called me to tell me he's paying for the window repair.

There’s nothing worse than a broken window

It’s always a pane to fix

A nun goes to the priest and says "father, there's a hole in the roof of your church."

"Thank you for telling me," he replies "but you've been here for years, it's our church."

The next day the nun goes to the priest and says "father, there's a broken window in your- I mean, our, church." He thanks her again and calls for a repairman.

The following day the priest is prep...

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A couple went golfing one day at a very exclusive course lined with million dollar homes.

On the third tee, the husband cautioned, Honey, be careful when you drive. If we break one of those windows, it'll cost us a fortune to repair.

Of course, she immediately shanked her drive right through the window of the biggest house on the course. The husband cringed, I warned you to watch ...

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The woodland animals built themselves a public toilet.

All went well for the first couple of weeks, then one morning as the toilet committee were inspecting the toilet, they found that one of the windows was smashed. They asked all the animals what had happened, and the rabbit said, "Last night the bear was taking a shit, and the toilet was out of paper...

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A couple is golfing on a golf course when their ball flies out of the course and smashes right through the window of an old mansion.

Shocked, the couple hastes to the old mansion and knock on the door.

A mysterious voice from within the mansion calls the couple to enter.

The couple enters the mansion and in the hallway they see an old man standing next to the broken window and a broken chinese vase with their golfba...

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Animals built an outhouse

Forest animals decided, that they don't like stepping on crap every day, so they got together and built an outhouse.

Everything was great and forest floor was much cleaner after that. But one day, they found out, that window on the outhouse was broken. So they held a meeting, where they were ...

A couple is playing golf, when accidentally the ball flies out of the field and breaks a window of a nearby house

The house looks quite expensive, and the couple is very nervous, wondering how much they have to pay for the window. They knock the door, and a middle aged man opens it.

The husband apologizes: “Good afternoon sir. I and my wife were playing golf here. We didn’t mean it, but we have to apolog...

A physicist, a biologist, and a mathematician are relaxing on a hill

A physicist, a biologist, and a mathematician are relaxing on a hill overlooking an abandoned house. They watch two people enter the house through a broken window. Time passes. Later they observe three people leave the house.

The physicist says, "Our measurements weren't accurate."

The...

My house is a stone's throw away from the bus stop.

It's the one with broken windows.

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Animals in the forest have a meeting. The bear as the chief of the forest decides to create an outhouse and they immediatelly built it.

The next day the outhouse has broken window.

So the Bear called everyone and said:

Who knows something about that?

A squirel put her arm up and says:

"I know something about that.."

"I was jumping from a branch to a branch and suddenly the wolf took me, clean his a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man and his wife are at a golf resort...

He tries to teach his wife how to swing a club
"I already know how to hit a ball, watch this" she replies. She takes a big swing and hits the ball, the ball soars in the air and goes through a window of a mansion which happens to be at the resort. "Shit, we have to go apologize" says the husband...

A husband and a wife were searching for a hotel near the ocean...

The travel agency hooked them up with a four star hotel for a great price, and they decided to go with it. The agency described the hotel as 'a stone's throw from the beach'. "How will we know which one it is?" the wife asked. "Simple", the agency replied; "It's the one with all the broken windows."

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