UPJOKE

Be King Jokes

What do you call the play about the pretzel who wanted to be king of Scotland?

Snackbeth

What do you call a rabbit that's gonna be king?

An Heir

A guy marvels at himself in the mirror

Guy: "Ah just three more inches and I'd be KING"

His wife on the bed behind him: "Three inches less and you'd be QUEEN"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Trump meets the Queen

So Donald asks the Queen how you get to be king or a duke or other Royalty.

Queen:’ Look Donald, an Emperor rules an Empire, a king rules a kingdom, a prince ruled a principality, a duke rules a duchy and so on’
Donald:’ I rule the USA, what does that make me’
Queen:”that’s a country,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three scientists are arguing about the meanest animal in the jungle

The first scientist says, "The meanest animal in the jungle is the the King of the Jungle himself, the lion. He wouldn't be the king if he wasn't the meanest bastard in there."

The second scientist says, "The lion may be king, but the meanest animal is actually the water buffalo. Even a lion ...

Mirror Mirror

A man is admiring himself in the mirror. As he flexes and checks himself out he says, “An inch more and I’d be king.”

The mirror begins laughing, “An inch less and you'd be a queen.”

“Balls!” Said the Queen.

“If I had two I’d be king!”

“Nuts!” Said the Prince. “I’ve got them and I’m not.”

In the onion kingdom, the red onions ruled over all other onions. The red onion King was a well respected ruler. However, one fateful day, the spring onions rebelled.

As the red onion King was thrown from his dais, he turned to the leader of the rebellion. "You'll never truly be King! You're nothing but a shallot-on!"

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