UPJOKE

Balls Deep Jokes

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So There I Was, Balls Deep in Some Peanut Butter...

When I thought to myself "Man...I'm fucking nuts."

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I caught my brother balls deep in peanut butter...

I wondered why anyone would name a dog peanut butter.

A friend told me this hopefully it hasn't been posted here before

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I came home yesterday to find my roommate balls deep in the Planters guy.

I said "Are you fucking nuts".

He replied, "They're actually legumes".

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So there I was, balls deep in a jar of mayonnaise. When I said to myself, "Self..."

"I shoulda made a sandwich first."

My wife asked me where I'd like to be buried? \

Apparently "balls deep in your sister" wasn't the answer she was expecting.

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An aspiring rapper finds a genie in a bottle...

"What are your three wishes?" the genie asks?

"First, I want to bring back Tupac and Biggie," he says. POOF! Tupac Shakir and Notorious B.I.G. appear beside him.

"Next I want to us all to live in Snoop's crib." POOF! The three are kicking it inside Snoop Dogg's huge mansion.
...

wrong answer

A guy shows up at his local pub with a black eye. "What happened to you?" asks the bartender.

"Oh, this morning my wife asked me where I would like to be buried," says the guy.

"So?" asks the bartender.

And the guy says, "Apparently, 'Balls deep in her sister' wasn't the answer...

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I called work and said I am sick

My boss said “How sick are you?”

I replied “ I am balls deep in my dead nan”

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Halloween in Jamaica

It's Halloween in Jamaica and some friends are organising a costume party. Everyone's told that the theme of the party is Moods and Feelings.

One the night itself, there's a knock on the door and when the host opens it, standing on the porch are two guys, completely naked, except for the fact...

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A math problem

We start with a box of 26 balls, each with a letter printed on it. The balls are arranged so that the top row has 13 balls, the second to top, 7, the third 3, fourth 2, and finally 5th 1. Jenny is tasked with determing the minimum depth in which she would have to collect in order to get a specific l...

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Two Jamaicans...

***If you have a thing against bad accents, you're going to have a bad time.***

...Are browsing thru some generic, privately-owned shop. On their way out one of them remarks, "Dere's nuting to do in dis town." The couple who owns the shop overhears this while clerking at the front counter and...

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So there I was...

...balls deep in a man's ass.
He turns around and asks "Hey, can I have a reach-around?"
So I asked, "What are you, gay?"

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So there are these two farmers...

...who grew up together. They met in high school during FFA (Future Farmer's of America) and became best friends. Years later, they are both very successful, married and own their own farms. The first farmer decides to pay his friend a visit, but as he he drives up, he see his friend over by the ...

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