Bald Guy Jokes

Because from a distance they look like hares

An obnoxious drunk comes up to him, rubs his head and says “your head feel’s just like my wife’s ass”. The bald guy feels his own head and says, “hey, you’re right!”

Bro: "Not off the top of my head."

That's it that's the thought that made me laugh today

Because he wanted to run his fingers through his hair.

He had toupe.

Homeless.

Talk about the advantages of a reseating airline.

Doctor said he had a receding hairline fracture.

because he forgot toupee

so they get bored with all the commercials and suddenly one of the two notices a bald guy in the middle of the front row. So he tells his friend '' 5 bucks if i go smash his head ? ''. The other guy curious about the outcome likes the idea so he agrees. The man stands up goes down the stairs smashes... read more

The bald guy reaches up and rubs his head. "Wow. You're right." he replies.

The first guy says, "I’d look even worse with a liver on my head."

But then I remembered there was nothing to joke about.

- "See that guy with no hands right there? Go tell him
to grab the hair of that bald guy standing near the river."
- "But dad, I'm blind"
- "I know"

I always thought asking my barber where he gets his haircut.

And then go there.

And then slowly make my way up the chain so I can find the greatest barber in the world.

Who is probably a bald guy.

The first one says, "I wanna be a plumber, so I can fix the pipes in here."

The second one says, "I wanna be an electrician, so I can get some lights in here."

The third one says, "I wanna be a boxer."

The other two ask, "Why do you want to be a boxer?"

He replies, "So I ... read more

There are two guys sitting at a bar having a beer together. So one guy goes to the other "I'll bet you $20 i can go over there slap that bald guy on the head and he won't do anything about it." so the other guy is like sure but he is going to beat you up. so the guy goes over smacks the bald guy on ... read more

The son points to a photo and asks:

"Mom, who is this muscular guy with so much hair?"

His mother responds:

"Can't you see that? That is your father."

"Oh..." He pauses "But if he's my father, then who is that fat bald guy that lives here?"

bored by the wait, the first guy decides to have fun. He gazes across the distance and spots a lonely bald man and challenges his friend to go smack him on his head for twenty bucks.
The second guy accepts the challenge. He goes behind the bald guy and slaps the man behind his shiny bald head - ... read more

He approaches the barkeeper and tells him

"I have something in my pocket that I will show you. If you swear you've never seen anything like it before, I'll have free drinks all night"

The barkeeper, in his mid fifties, who has clearly seen a lot in his life, agrees with a nod.

T... read more

He is stopped in his tracks at the pearly gates by St Peter.

"My child, you are not yet permitted to enter Heaven," St Peter says.

"May I know why not?" the man asks.

"Well, you see, our database has not been updated yet and the current indication here is that you have not done ... read more

John was a bald guy, Harry was very fat man and Nathan had night blindness but all three loved to brag and boast.

As they were continuing on their way, a car passed by them at blazing fast speed.

John, was naturally offended. He shouted immediately, "DAMN! That thing was so fast it sh... read more

1. When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison.

2. To me, "drink responsibly" means don't spill it.

3. Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 pm is the new midnight.

4. It's the start of a brand new day, and I'm off like a herd of turtles.

5. The... read more

so the cop gets out calling for backup and shouts "Keep your hands on the wheel!" while approaching the driver's side. He instructs the driver to lower the window. It's a pale bald guy wearing a dark turtleneck and thick plastic eyeglasses.

"Ja? I vas just admiring Ihre Autobahn. There is ein... read more