My old aunts would come and tease me at weddings, “Well Sarah? Do you think you’ll be next?”

We’ve settled this quickly once I’ve started doing the same to them at funerals.

My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”

They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between a bull and a band that plays at weddings?

On the bull, the horns are in front and the asshole is in the back.

Recently my Grandma has been coming up to me at weddings and saying “Soon it will be your turn!”

She didn’t appreciate it when I started saying the same thing to her at funerals

kids at wedding

kid: Mom, why does the bride wear white clothes?

mother: because it is the happiest day in her life.

kid: So, why the groom is wearing black?

Always hated how at weddings the old family farts would cuckle and say "It's your turn next time.."

So I started telling them the same at funerals

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Ray Rice jokes for DAYS!

There's like maybe four or five jokes in this list that were already posted on the internet, but the rest of this list was pretty much made up by me while I was bored. Ray Rice's incident is a gold mine of humor....just not for him. Easily offended need not apply here. Enjoy.

1.) Ray Rice's w...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Octopus Joke Retold

So this guy walks into a bar with an Octopus. He is named the Amazing Octodad, seriously it's on his T-shirt. He heads to the bar, gets a beer and waits for the music to stop. A cute blonde gives a weird wtf look when a tentacle starts wriggling over to tickle her leg but Octodad just winks and says...

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