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A Man Walks Into A Library Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a library and says to the librarian, "Do you have that book for men with small penises?"

The librarian looks on her computer and says, "I don’t know if it's in yet."

"Yeah, that's the one!"

A man walks into a library, goes to the librarian, and says "I'm looking for a book called 'Pavlov's Dog and Schrödinger's Cat".

The librarian says "That rings a bell, but I'm not sure if it's there or not".

A man walks into a library and asks where he can find books on paranoia.

The librarian whispers, "They're right behind you!"

A man walks into a library

He sees the most beautiful librarian behind the counter. He says "Will you go on a date with me? "

She replies "No. I'm fully booked"

A man walks into a library...

And he asks "Excuse me, is The Big Book of Turtles in?"

"Hard back?"

"Yeah, with little heads"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a library asking for a book about how to commit suicide.

Librarian: Fuck off, you won't bring it back.

A man walks into a library and orders a hamburger

The librarian says, "This is a library."

The man apologizes and whispers, "I'd like a hamburger, please."

A man walks into a library. “Where are your books on BDSM?”

The librarian does not look up from her reference book. “I’m sorry sir, they are still being bound.”

a man walks into a library

and says in a loud voice “can i please order a piece of battered fish, 2 potato cakes and minimum chips”

the librarian replies in a firm but quiet voice ‘Sir, you’re in a library’

the man whispers ‘Sorry, can i please order a piece of battered fish, 2 potato cakes and minimum chips”

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