UPJOKE

30 Years Of Marriage Jokes

Judge : why did you kill your wife after 30 years of marriage

husband : because of procrastination, every day I tell myself I'll do it tomorrow

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

After 30 years of marriage, I'm tells my envious friends that I still get sex almost every day..

Friends: no way!

Me: yup! Almost on a Monday.. almost on a Tuesday.. almost on a Wednesday.. almost on a Thursday, almost on a Friday, almost on a Saturday and almost on a Sunday!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A frustrated wife goes to the doctor (long)

"Doctor, you have to help me. I've been married 30 years to my husband and I feel he's lost all interest in me. You know, phisically speaking. He barely looks at me, let alone have sex with me. Oh, I really miss the good old times where we had wonderful sex multiple times a week, there must be somet...

After 30 years of marriage, people always ask, "What's the secret of keeping the romance alive?" I always tell them...

We go to the same romantic restaurant every week, twice a week...

I go on Tuesday. She goes on Fridays.

Credit - Henny Youngman

After 30 years of marriage a wife asked her husband to describe her.

He looked at her slowly and then said: "A-B-C-D-E-F-G-H-I-J-K."

"What does that mean?" she asked.

"Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous and Hot" he replied.

She smiled happily and then asked, "What about I-J-K?"

He replied, "I'm Just Kidding!...

A man was convicted of murdering his wife of 30 years

Before handing the sentence, the judge addressed the defendant: "The court would like you to explain what made you murder your wife after over 30 years of marriage".
"Well, your honor" answered the defendant "it's mostly procrastination. Every day I kept telling myself I'll do it tomorrow..."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bill and Hillary

When Bill and Hillary first got married Bill said, “I put a box under the bed. You must promise never to look in it.”
In all their 30 years of marriage, Hillary never looked. On the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In it ...

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