UPJOKE

2 Step Jokes

There are 2 steps to being successful

1. Do not reveal everything you know.

We went for a hike at the weekend , despite the blustery conditions , and despite taking 2 steps forward then 3 steps back we battled against the weather quite well.

Then it happened, from nowhere came down the sandwiches, sausage rolls, scotch eggs quiche and Vol-au-vent and then I realised we was being buffetted by the wind.

How to lose your girlfriend/wife in 2 steps

Step 1- start an argument
Step 2- provide a logical explanation of why you started it.

How to be cool in 2 steps.

A) Get sunglasses

B)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Spiritual Magic Fail

Jesus and Moses are hanging out at a lake when Moses asks Jesus, "When was the last time you've used your powers, feels like it's been ages!"

Jesus replies, "It's definitely been awhile but let's test them out!"

Moses stands up, rubs his hands together and points them at the lake and s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Everything is big in Texas

A guy walks into bar in Texas and orders a burger. The damn thing is almost 3 lbs with all the fixings.

He asks the bartender " this is the burger you offer?!?!"

Bartender says "yeah man everything is big in Texas"

He is in awe and can't help but wonder what a beer looks like i...

Walking is super annoying to learn.

It always takes more than 2 steps to figure out.

Three nuns die and go to Heaven...

The nuns walk up to the Pearly Gates and are greeted by St. Peter.

"Hello ladies. In order to get into Heaven you have one final task. You all must answer one question each to enter the Holy Gates of Heaven."

The nuns each looked at each other and nodded in agreement.

Nun #1 ste...

In order to join our club, you must perform the dance

It's called 2 step verification

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