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Stint Jokes

The caretaker of a generation ship was on his death bed

Many years before, Jacques had helped place all his friends and family into cryogenic sleep. He was a young man then and they all knew that he would likely be long dead by the time they reached their destination. They said their tearful goodbyes and drifted off to sleep.

In the years he spent...

Danny DeVito was behind bars, allegedly for financial crimes against his wife...

During his stint in lockdown, he earned the nickname, "Powerhouse."

His new cellmate, seeing how short and squat and old he was, asked him, "Man, how did you ever get the name 'powerhouse?'"

"It's short for 'the powerhouse of the cell block." But his cellmate still looked perplexed, so...

I once knew a guy arrested on drug charges, and though he thought he'd get off light, they ended up slapping a bunch of other bogus charges on him, which, added to the fact that his lawyer was one of the worst in the state, eventually led him to being handed a 40 year stint in a max security prison.

That sentence was way too long.

Some Good News From America!

We're currently celebrating our longest stint without a mass shooting in 20 years!

So there's that.

up on the oil rigs

so these two albertans, jordan and teddy, are working away up north, on a long stint. jordan says "hey teddy, whats the first thing you're gonna do when you get home" and teddy replies "I'm gonna go straight upstairs and tear off my wifes panties!" and jordan says "oh yeah??" and teddy replies "ye...

There was a lad named John

There was a lad named John who was dealt a bad hand since he was born. He was an orphan who was brought up in a for profit orphanage, leading him to suffer mental trauma amongst other issues. After turning 16, he was kicked out of the orphanage with no support whatsoever. Not knowing what to do, he ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The new priest and the confessional booth.

A newly ordained priest is about to do his first stint in the confessional booth. A bit nervous, he asks the bishop for some advice and guidance.

"Son", says the bishop, "here, take this book, I've listed all the common sins and their penance so don't be nervous at all".

Armed with th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Grandpa, tell the story again when you broke a duck's neck with your erection at your brother's wedding!"

Well, children, the year was 1922. I had nothing more than a flatcap, a shovel, and my favorite pint glass to my name. It was around the time where cars were a brand new luxury and a lass would let you put a thumb in her bum just to honk the horn. Well as luck would have it, I was out peat poaching ...

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